Dowry

Brat Child: Can I marry you mom?
Me: No, we've talked about this, it's illegal.
Brat Child: Oh yeah, but I can marry my cousin.
Me: Technically, yes.
Brat Child: That's good because Kelly is single. And she has an XBOX.

Getting Married

 

 Brat Child: I want to marry you, Mom
Me: You can't, it's illegal. You can't marry your sister either. You can marry a cousin though in some states.
Brat Child: No you can't.
Me: Yes you can
Brat Child: No way, I bet you lots of dollars you can't.
Me: Yup you could marry Kelly in some states (Looking up information) You can marry your cousin in Maryland and Virginia but not West Virginia where she lives.
Brat Child: Guess she's gonna have to move.

Keeping It In The Family

While at dinner one night...
     Brat Child: Can I marry Midge?
     Me: No, you can't marry your sister.
     BC: Not even when I'm as old as you?
     Me: You can never marry your sister even if you're old. The law says you can't.
     BC: But what happens when I get old and she gets old and she has another family. I'll miss her!

Diamonds

Brat Child: (climbing into bed one morning and putting his arm around me) You wanna kiss at the beach baby?
Me: Uh, no, you don't really say stuff like that to your mom.
BC: How 'bout if I marry you?
Me: You can't marry your mom.
BC: How'bout Midge.  She's not a mom.
Me: No you can't marry your sister, that's legal only in Kentucky and West Virginia not legal in Pennsylvania, Maryland or Virginia.
BC: Den I'm gonna marry you.
Me: OK fine.
BC: I'm gonna marry you, Mom, and den I'm gonna buy you diamonds at Wal-Mart.