This Post is Going Downhill

The Brat Child: Mama Mia!
Me: Do you know the song that goes with that?
Brat Child: No
Me: Mama Mia, Papa Pia, baby's got the diarrhea!
Brat Child: Awesome!
Me: Have you ever heard the Diarrhea Song?
Brat Child: No! What is it?!
Big E: Oh, God!

(It's obvious that the Brat Child doesn't fall far from the Momma tree.)

Diarrhea Song

When you're sliding into first
and you feel a sudden burst
Diarrhea! Diarrhea!

When you're sliding into two
and your pants fill with goo
Diarrhea! Diarrhea!

When you're sliding into third
and you feel a sudden turd
Diarrhea! Diarrhea!

When you're sliding into home
and you're pants are full of foam
Diarrhea! Diarrhea!

There are many more verses, and many you could make yourself.... to satisfy your inner Brat Child.

The Zombie Song

The Brat Child's favorite song is We Will Rock You performed by Queen.  He has his mother's excellant musical taste. When it plays, no one else is allowed to sing along except him.
One evening I asked him about the song...

Me: Why is We Will Rock You your favorite song?
Brat Child: 'A cuz it's about zombies.
Me: It is? I thought it was more about winning.
Brat Child: (sighing deeply obviously irritated at his mother's lack of knowledge) No, it's about Zombies, Mom. They say "blood on your face", that's talking about a zombie.  Zombies have blood all on their faces from eating brains. And it's talking about a guy who gets bit in the head by a zombie and now his face is bleeding.
Me: Really? I never got that from that song before.
Brat Child: That's 'a cuz you don't know about zombies or zombie songs.
Me: What about the "mud on your face" part or "kicking your can?"
Brat Child: The guy that got bit fell down trying to get away from the zombie and he got mud on him.  Then the zombie knocked down the trash cans because zombies walk with their arms out not really looking where they're going.
Me: I totally get the song now.
Brat Child: You'reWelcome.